Problem Page
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My husband’s affair ?
4 years ago, my husband had an affair with a woman from his work. It had been going on for six months when I found out. He promised then that he had stopped seeing her. I know that the relationship went on for a while after that, but I just wanted to forget and move on . I think it’s over now, but I keep thinking of what he put me through and how he treated me, I just can’t seem to get it out of my head . We have some great times together, he tells me how much he loves me and that he can’t believe how lucky he is to still have me. We decided not to talk about the affair after the event as we were arguing constantly . When can I start being the person I used to be - happy and contented? I just want to put this all behind me and get on with my marriage and be a normal couple again .
From Rebecca
Answer
The problem you have is that you can not put it down to a one night stand and therefore it's not surprising that you're still upset about it. If you are unable to talk to your husband or friends about how you feel, then I suggest that you find a good counsellor or psychotherapist as you will need to talk to someone for some time to resolve your inner feelings .
My boyfriend ogles blondes!
I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. He always does a double take when he sees a blonde woman (I am dark haired). He tells me he doesn't know why he does it, but would never be unfaithful. I find it hard to trust him because of his ogling, though he never flirts with them. Am I being paranoid or is he unreasonable?
From Suzanne
Answer
It is scientifically proven that long blonde hair does capture a males attention, but this does not mean that every man will stare at blonde haired woman . I really don't think you have much to worry about. There's nothing wrong with looking as long as he is not touching! .The thing is the blondes may get the once over by him but you get the whole thing- be confident, you should be after 2 years. I'm sure there's the odd time you look at certain guys too...you just don't get caught! You could dye your hair blonde if you really wanted just to surprise your boyfriend, but other than that you needn't be so paranoid.
